oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
did i walk over a car last night?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
