i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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