Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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