Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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