i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
