be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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