youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize