I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
