chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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