are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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