i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
this just has baby written all over it
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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