Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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