I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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