now i know why i became what i already was.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
