Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
where are my eyebrows?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize