We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize