so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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