how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
