What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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