have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
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