my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
