OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Randomize
