Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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