oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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