Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
