let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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