you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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