Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
