I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
