thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize