where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize