I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
