i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Randomize
