May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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