did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
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