i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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