i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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