You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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