I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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