Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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