Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it