Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Randomize
