She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
