you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
