i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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