whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
