White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He told me they were just razor bumps!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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