we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
