I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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