smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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