I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize