Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
